Wednesday, November 5, 2014

HOPE.

So much has gone on the past (nearly) two months, hence neither of us being able to write until now. A trip to see family in NC, baby showers, appointments, Lane's continued therapy, embarking on a new Bible study with friends, preparing for our little one, and enjoying any precious time we can get continuing to pursue each other.

As far as therapy goes we are loving Lane's new facility, Origami. They are doing everything they can to help  Lane function independently. We are thrilled with the ideas they have given us that will allow Lane to continue to work towards helping with our baby when it's born. We're quickly finding out that things as simple as a Boppy pillow are going to be miracle workers and will assist with the father-child bonding time that Lane and I so desire him to have.

One area that remains the same is Lane's level of muscle tone/spasticity that is not assisting with certain therapy progressions. All of his therapists have talked extensively with us about re addressing the baclofen pump and the huge potential that it could have with allowing the muscle movement that Lane DOES have to be able to take place (and not be overridden by unwanted tone/spacisity). His upper extremities especially tend to be affected by this. November 13th Lane has an appointment with a physiatrist who will be doing a baclofen pump trial via a lumbar puncture to see if he is a candidate for an actual Intrathecal Baclofen Pump. Please join us in praying that if this is something that will help the ITB trial next week will be a success. If it is, we will schedule the insertion of the Baclofen Pump as soon as there is an opening.

A few words to sum up the rest of our lives right now? Beautiful chaos. Beautiful because we are able to take on life together, in our own home. Beautiful because we can take impromptu dates whenever and wherever we want. Beautiful because we get to sleep in the same bed every night. Beautiful because we are preparing together for our precious blessing. Beautiful because we are a skype call away from our NC family and surrounded by our MI family and fellow believers that are supporting, encouraging, and spurring us on in just the ways we need. Beautiful most of all because we rest in the unwavering hope and strength of our Savior. Chaotic? Yes. Having caregivers in our home every morning to prepare for the day and at night to get ready for bed has taken a long time to adjust to. Not understanding why Lane still has so many physical difficulties is so frustrating and confusing at times, for both of us. Not knowing what in the world our lives will look like and what progression will have taken place in as little as 6 months from now can be extremely disheartening. Not being able to be heard 100% of the time when he so desires to talk (because of his weakened diaphragm) is also  understandably a major frustration of  Lane's. The list of these things could go on for a long time. From the honest heart of a wife that so desires to see her husband do the things he once could do physically, there are many nights where I can't get my mind off the negative aspects of a TBI...and why we are having to deal with this.

At one of my showers a couple weekends back I was reminded and encouraged of how we are able to live with hope and peace during times that no one on this earth understands or can explain. And honestly, I can't begin to fathom a moment of this journey apart from this hope and peace. My momma friend that did the devotional at the shower took us to Romans 5:3-5 and reminded me of these beautiful truths. Lane and I can both say without a shadow of doubt that the unexplainable hope that Christ has equipped us with during this time is something we have or could never experience elsewhere in this life.

Yes our life is chaotic and messy and frustrating at times, but if I were to ask you (if you were honest) I know you'd say the same of yours. Such is life on this earth until Christ calls us home. Until then we are clinging to the precious truths that we find in God's word and are ever grateful that in the midst of whatever circumstance He allows in this life, He  remains the same.

We so appreciate your continued prayer in the days to come. We are praying for you today too, dear friends.


Emily (for Lane and Little B too)


Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us. Romans 5:1-5