Sunday, December 20, 2015
Saturday, November 7, 2015
www.youcaring.com "A House for Lane and Emily"
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
As we thought we came across the ideal home for our family (and budget) about a month ago (after two+ months of searching), this was what a piece of our conversation looked like. And so began the endless paperwork of writing an offer, with the greatest contingency being the accessible builder approving that all the needed modifications could take place and insurance approving the modification price (see previous blog post). The offer was accepted but we didn't fully set our hearts on the house as we had no idea what the extent of the needed modifications would be.
This past week we had the official evaluation of the house done by Lanes OT and accessible builder. It was an incredible learning experience to say the least and we were so grateful for all they did, but by the end of the three hours we were simply exhausted. This past Monday when we received the rough approximate of the modification price we were overwhelmed and pretty surprised. The modifications needed would exceed the price of the house! With this specific house there are non accessible structural issues that we didn't know existed (garage would have to be widened for the width of our van + ramp and inside stairway moved back so a vertical incline lift could get down the stairway with the height of lane & his chair, just to name a few).
After discussion with Lanes case manager and builder the past few days, we've decided to take some time off to consider what to do next. We were told our insurance company will pay nowhere close to the estimated modification fees (for this house) with the Michigan Auto No Fault rulings the past few years so we are left with the choice to submit the report/estimate regardless and get turned down or start our search back up again. And ultimately after this experience we are rethinking whether buying or building would be most wise with our very unique situation in the end.
Even though we are disappointed with the news of this house (most likely) not working out, we do not lose heart. We have so much to look to our faithful Father in thankfulness for, most importantly the things that "moth and rust don't destroy." And we aren't in a hurry to get out of our apartment, we'll just be grateful to spread out a bit and have adequate space for Lane's therapy equipment/rehab when we can. Until then, we continue to rest and trust in the all-sufficient One who has brought us thus far. Will you join us in praying for wisdom and direction for what housing situation would be best for our family to pursue at this time?
Emily, for Lane and Nyra
When my heart is overwhelmed lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:2
Monday, September 14, 2015
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Know what’s crazy? Our daughter is eight months old! She says “dada” and “mumum” now, steals our hearts with gummy two-toothed grins, and grabs anything she can reach (including Daddy’s watch and Mommy’s hair). We love watching her feed herself little snacks while she sits up all by herself.
Emily is all-in when it comes to being a mom, and I love watching her take care of our baby girl, when it’s fun and when it’s exhausting. Emily unintentionally created, but now faithfully upholds, an after-dinner ritual of playing “Where’s Mama?” while Nyra squeals in my lap.
Daddy loves snuggling with Nyra when she feels like staying put (a rarity lately, making it extra nice when it does happen). She can’t decide if my wheelchair is an extension of my body or a jungle gym for her climbing pleasure. I don’t mind, because either way it’s adorable. Some days it’s really hard not being able to pick her up and toss her in the air or tickle her pudgy little tummy or read her books in silly voices - things I thought were required of every good father before I became one myself. As much as these unmet expectations hurt, I know objectively and hold on to the truth that fatherhood isn’t about what a man is or isn’t able to do – but rather about what he chooses to do with what he has. I can either choose to (and too often do) despair in the hardship of my family’s circumstances, or I can acknowledge the reality of our circumstances and how small and fleeting they are compared to the glory of what awaits us in our certain future with Christ in heaven (Romans 8:18, 2 Corinthians 4:17)
I’m still plodding along in therapy three days a week, making small gains and trying to stay encouraged, though progress is slow. We’re looking forward to seeing my parents soon, as they fly up in mid-September. It’s sure to be a time of fun, hopefully some conversation, and definitely much Nyra-spoilage.
Thank you all for reading and praying!
Lane (for Emily and Nyra too)
Thursday, June 25, 2015
Since our last post we've been able to spend time with both of our families, so Nyra was able to meet, interact with, and get loved on by almost all of her aunts and uncles. She loves and thrives on interaction with people. With her Bargeron aunts and uncles she was able to swim in a pool and see a lighthouse for the first time. She also took her first boat ride and just loves 'babble' and play time with all 4 of her Davis girl cousins. We cherish these sweet times with our loved ones.
With Nyra having turned 6 months last Friday, Lane's first Father's Day this past Sunday, and Lane's birthday this coming Friday (tomorrow), we have much to look to our Heavenly Father in thankfulness for. Each of these events all have the common thread of the precious gift of life. We had no idea we'd have the privilege of celebrating (again or for the first) any of these after our accident. Not only has our gracious Father allowed us to celebrate my wonderful husband's 24th birthday this week, but because Lane lived through the accident we are able to celebrate the gift of our precious daughter's life and his fatherhood. We are constantly reminded that our good Father didn't have to allow any of these gifts but he did. By this we are sobered, encouraged, and our hearts are overwhelmed with gratitude.
Our days as a family have otherwise been filled with Nyra's feedings, playtime, and diaper changes, grocery runs, reading together, walks outside, Lane's therapy, outings together or with friends, and sleeping while we can. For the time being I am able to assist as one of Lane's caregivers so I don't have to work outside the home. This is a tremendous blessing as I am able to first and foremost be a wife and mama, then Lane's caregiver as needed. In the near future Lane will be starting vocational rehab so please be praying with us that his vocational therapist will be able to assist him in finding work with his computer-related abilities.
Please also continue to pray that we'd find our encouragement, contentment, strength and perseverance only in Christ. And that we'd persevere in patience where God has us right now, not anxiously wondering what the future might hold. Some days as we look around us, our situation, our ongoing needs, or what's before us today, it's nothing short of overwhelming and discouraging. From the world's eyes we've often been asked how we remain joyful or are even able to press on despite our circumstances. And as I've said in multiple posts, there are days that are incredibly hard. Christ didn't promise that we'd have lives free of pain or grief on this earth. Nor does our grief or pain mean Christ doesn't remain good. On days we choose to dwell only on our physical abilities/disabilities though our joy is quickly sapped and it does seem impossible to press on. This is why the source of our joy, encouragement, contentment and strength simply cannot come from anything within us, regardless of what the world attempts to say. Another reminder why we must fix our eyes not on what is momentary but what is eternal and unseen as we face affliction in this life (2 Corinthians 4:18). I was greatly challenged as I came across this blog the other day that speaks of how to stand beside, encourage, and pray for someone who is going through grief or a difficult circumstance. One specific paragraph reminded me of a truth I've been reminded of time and time again--
"People can have great faith and feel great pain at the same time. Pain is not a sign of weak faith. Many have testified that their faith and recognition of God's providing hand was strongest during their toughest trials."
The entire blog post can be found here http://www.kendrabroekhuis.com/blog/i-dont-know-what-to-say
Thank you for continuing to pray for and stand beside us in the trying moments as well as the times of celebration. The discouraging (yet encouraging) aspect of a TBI is that there is no specific "pathway to recovery", certain amount of meds to take before one is healed, or even prognosis of whether or not an individual will be able to recover 100%. The hardest question that we've been asked (by well meaning friends/family/strangers) from the beginning is how long the doctor is saying recovery will take. With grace we've attempted to explain that we have no idea, nor does anyone but God. What Lane will continue to do though is press on with therapy and whatever else his doctors recommend while being a spiritual leader/learner, husband, and father foremost. We are so grateful that this injury nor should any difficult circumstances in this life ultimately define us. We hope you are encouraged by this truth today.
With Christ as our guide and greatest certainty we choose to rest in His promise that He will never leave or forsake us. Looking to the author and perfecter of our faith as we take on today,
Emily (for Lane and Nyra)
Tuesday, March 17, 2015
Since I last posted we've had days filled with cooing, toothless grins, reading countless children's books aloud, and getting as much cuddle time as we can with our ever growing 3 month old. Amidst the poopy blow outs, spit up covered clothes, and sleepless nights of course. Parenting is no doubt one of the greatest gifts our Father has given Lane and I as we take on this life together. In the mundane days, in the midst of the poopiest diapers and colic filled nights, we are humbled and learning ever SO much. We appreciate your continued prayer as we take on this incredible gift.
In the past two months a few other major things have taken place, one planned, the other not so much. First of all, Lane had a baclofen pump placed and is in the process of getting it adjusted (slowly) to his therapeutic level. We've already seen some great results with decreased muscle tone and spasms. His therapists will work with him closely the next few months to get it to the right dosage for him. See previous posts if you don't know what an itb pump is. Then at the end of February Lane started having extremely high temps and sustained tachycardia (high heart rate). Within a couple hours of going in to Urgent Care one day he was being treated for potential sepsis in the ICU. Thankfully the infection was pretty quickly treated with antibiotics, which they suspected was related to his kidney stone build up. They have been and will continue to address what will be needed to have the stones removed.
As a family we're learning the importance of "being all there" wherever we are. Whether its an expected hospital visit, spending the day with our daughter at home, interacting with the aids that come and go, striking up a conversation with a neighbor as we get the mail, or in the unexpected moments where we have no idea what will happen next. We are learning to take on life with the strength and grace and joy God has equipped us with in the circumstances of today. As our heavenly Father pours his grace into our lives over and over again we recognize that even in the days where it's hard to look past the next moment, we are fully equipped. Pray with us that we'd never lose sight of these truths. Some days are most definitely harder than others.
We appreciate each and every one of you that is continuing to keep up with and pray for our family. Know that we will continue to post our happenings here, but as you've seen with this post, they won't be often. Our social media time has hugely decreased since our Nyra was born as she needs every bit of the undivided attention we can give her:) Our family email is email@example.com if you want to keep in touch more often.
Emily (for the Lane B clan:)
Monday, January 19, 2015
We appreciate your prayer as we begin the intensely wonderful journey of parenthood. Pray that we'd look to Christ for the daily strength that we need and that we'd be point our daughter to Him even in our weaknesses and frailties. Next month is Lane's long-awaited Baclofen pump surgery. Please join us in prayer as he undergoes the surgery but also afterwards as his therapists work with the potentially positive effects of his decreased tone.
Emily (proud wife and mama!)